tarynel:

iwantursex:

dickprintbandit:

luvyourselfsomeesteem:

Vaginas are expected to be bald, super soft with no stubble, smell like fresh picked lavender and taste like a mango yet there are so many hairy, discolored, sweaty and salty ballsacks out there demanding to be in a mouth.

girl.

And not a lie was spoken

Gospel.

the-king-of-coney-island:

⊱✰⊰

slapmytitties:

Jfc

the signs as cr1tikal quotes

• aries: you can turn that shitty knife into a titty knife.
• taurus: fuck you and your formal attire.
• gemini: most owls can turn their heads 270 degrees in both directions. this owl can fuck itself in all directions.
• cancer: oh, okay. guess i'll go fuck myself then.
• leo: good evening. tonight's special is the shit blizzard.
• virgo: ah, just a little bit of ghost semen. a very common ingredient found in most beverages, so, might as well stick to the traditional.
• libra: you will all feast on the fuck.
• scorpio: his legs are trembling, his knees are weak, his mom's heavy, put your vagina in spaghetti.
• sagittarius: i'm ready to begin my journey with a full-fledged erection and a heart of ambition.
• capricorn: this bastard just got re-atomized.
• aquarius: serenade my candy ass, come on!
• pisces: i would rather solve a rubiks cube using only my bare nipples than try to make that fucking jump.

• What he says: I'm Sapiosexual
• What I hear: Jimmy Neutron gets me rock fucking solid

hospitalstays:

school cum

so there was this porn gif on my dash and the guy pulled up the girl’s boob

that looked kinda painful tho uh

megvnmvrie:

they dream haha